Monday, July 12, 2010


I have always struggled with trusting in God 100%... and when I need to trust in Him the most, I seem to trust in Him the least. Why is that?

There are some big things happening in my life… There’s a really, really, REALLY good chance that I will be in Sweden in two years… TWO YEARS. I have been looking into torchbearers- they are basically a program that has bible schools all over the world. As I was searching through their website, the bible school in Sweden caught my eye. The school in Sweden seemed perfect! Tuition, accommodation, and food for a year in Sweden will cost around $8,000…. Which is WAY cheaper than anything in the states!

The only problem is that…well… I don’t have $8,000. In fact, pretty much all the money I have saved up right now is going towards some college classes that I’m taking this summer.

Trust. That’s really what I need to be doing right now. Trusting that God will provide. Such an easy, simple phrase- yet such a hard action. Why is it so easy for us to trust other people? For us to even trust people we have NEVER MET? Yet it’s so hard for us to trust in God?

And how does that trust happen? By prayer? By practice? I guess Trust is a huge part of faith…

Hm. Now I feel like I’m just rambling. But trust has defiantly been on my mind A LOT… and it has always been a HUGE challenge for me. Something that I need to work on… and there has never been a better time than now!

I need to understand that if God wants me to be in Sweden, He’ll get me there!

This is a song by Phil Wickham called Mystery. The song itself is kinda hard to understand in this video (but never fear, I put the lyrics below!!!)... The main reason why I chose to put this video up is because of his intro... which is so true about my life path, journey thing (whatever you want to call this stage of my life!)


Here in the Quiet speak to me now
My ears are open to
Your gentle sweet whispering
Break down the door, come inside
Shine down Your bright light
I need a lamp for my feet, I need a lamp for my feet

I want to hear the thunder of who You are
To be captured inside the wonder of who You are
I want to live I want to breathe
To search out Your heart and all of Your mysteries

You were the first and You’ll be the end
Time cannot hold You down
Why save a wretch like me?
No eye has seen, no ear has heard
No heart could fully know
All of Your mystery

Your glory burns in the stars
Shine down your light let it burn in my heart
Bring me to glory, bring me to you
Lord it’s your heart that I will hold onto

Your glory burns in the stars
Shine down Your light let me know who You are
Jesus, Your glory burns in the stars
Shine down Your light, let me see You, let me see You

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